it got me scared, very scared.
i was jumping up and down, pulling my hairs, and biting myself, that's how scared i was.
all this because of you, i was scared to loose you, not having you for longer than this, but fortunately was just a concern, it was a wrong feeling, a wrong thought.
now i'm calm about to rest, and just remembered ''i forgot to do my history homework, oh well'', you are what's important to me.
she told me it's love, others say it's friendship, and i say it's in between.
i just like to spend hours talking to you, thinking of you, looking at you.
yes, you do make me smile.
by tickling me, but not just that.
talking to me it's enough to make me smile, a ''Hey'' from you it's enough to get me content.
i will not say i love you, and i won't say i don't.
we are both different, but we get along, so let's first try out as friends and see where it takes us.
im not revealing anything, i'm just expressing myself without letting anyone understand but you.
if you do understand, keep it for your self, think of me as a friend and let me smile for a longer time.
i miss this feeling, didn't feel it for a long time.
maybe because she's right.
i've been suffering for almost three years now, its enough for such a young child like me, don't you think?
maybe you think i'm just talking crap, trying to impress, trying to get you?
i don't know you tell me, but all i know i'm beeing realistic to myself.
as you can read on the top left side of the page, i'm not like others.
i know myself very well, and i know my feelings too.
i knew for sure that i only felt like this once until you arrived, you changed it, and now i don't know.
it got me thinking about you, and taking him off my mind for a while.
it felt good, it's a relief knowing that you will probably take him off my mind.
yes, he's special, but so are you.
i no more know where to stop, i no more think i will stop.
but i hope one day you will not make me smile, but let me love, laugh and live without having to think about him everyday, all day.
i've made lots of mistakes in life, i still have to personally tell you one of them.
i appologize, give me another chance in life, before you walk away.
now it's time for me to go to sleep, and dream with you holding my hand, hoping it will become true one day.